Friday, August 9, 2013

Box Office Blitz Week 5!

The last couple of weeks I watched "The League" on Netflix, which is a show about people in a fantasy football league.  Though Box Office Blitz is a little different, some of the principles are the same.  One idea I liked that they came up with to incentivize players is the notion of a last place booby prize.  In the show they came up with a trophy called "The Sacko" so named because part of the trophy looks like a man's ball sack.  They could do that since for the most part their league existed in the real world.  Since this is all online it would be a pain in the ass (or balls) to mail a trophy to someone.  And since this game involves movies, I got thinking that instead of a trophy, I'll send someone a really crappy movie as their "prize" for finishing last.

The movie that sprang to mind immediately was "The Human Centipede," a movie that was unpleasant to me in pretty much every aspect.  But for whatever reason it's going for $13 on Amazon right now and I don't feel like spending more than $5 on this.  So then I decided to look up movies by the worst director somehow still working--Uwe Boll.  Naturally he's got movies going for less than $3 on up.  Hooray!

So the Box Office Blitz version of the Sacko will be a copy of Uwe Boll's "masterpiece" Postal, which at the moment is going for $4.95.  If it somehow appreciates in value I'll pick another one.  In the interest of public shaming, the "winner" also gets this wonderful badge for his blog/website:

Introducing the Sacko!
As a final note on this, "last place" does not include anyone who plays for a week or two and then drops out because that would really devalue the hard work of the player who sucks week in and week out.  I will include myself for the Sacko, so you should all hope I completely stink up my own game for the next 22 weeks.

Now that I hope I've encouraged you to give it 110%, on with this week's game!  The object is still to pick the top 3 movies at the box office and put them in the right order.

Here's the list from my local megaplex:
  • 2 Guns
  • Before Midnight
  • Despicable Me 2
  • Elysium*
  • Fruitvale Station
  • Grown Ups 2
  • Man of Steel
  • Monsters University
  • Pacific Rim
  • Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters*
  • Planes*
  • RIPD
  • Red 2
  • The Conjuring
  • The Heat
  • The Smurfs 2
  • The To Do List
  • The Wolverine
  • Turbo
  • We're the Millers* (it's about 15 years too late for me to care about Jennifer Aniston playing a stripper)
  • White House Down
  • World War Z
I'm sensing a July 19 situation where you have a bunch of new movies but they all end up sucking.  Anyway, my crappy picks will be:
  1. Planes $32M
  2. Elysium $30M
  3. We're the Millers $20M
Make your picks in the comments below and try not to all pick the same thing...unless what you pick turns out to be exactly right.


  1. Elysium - $35 mil
    Planes - $27 mil
    Percy Jackson 2 - $20 mil

    Negative reinforcement. Good idea!

  2. Planes $40 Mil
    Elysium $36 Mil
    We're the Millers $27 Mil

    Jennifer Aniston can play stripper for me all she wants
    (the problem is she doesn't want to)

  3. So far, you and I are the only two signed up with teams in the Blogger Fantasy Football League, although I'm sure Michael and Lara and RUSTY YOU'RE IN, RIGHT? will sign up, but even so, I'm going to do a little free advertising here:

    If you WANT to be in a free fantasy football league with me and PT, I have set one up. You can email me at bfpageljr[at] (put "Fantasy Football" in the subject line.). Doesn't cost a thing, it takes like 10 minutes per week (honestly! You don't have to live and breathe this it's just for fun!) and you can get in on the betting action IF AND ONLY IF you want. (Doesn't cost a thing, remember?)

    PT: Get your brother to sign up. RUSTY GET ON THIS MAN.

    Anyway: my picks:

    Jennifer Aniston as a stripper? OK, if I don't have to talk to her. (Sweetie never reads these comments, and probably won't play this week as she's down with the flu or something. Don't worry, I washed my hands before I typed this.)

    But she won't do good at the box office.

    Planes is probably going to suck. But we're propping up the economy by Mr Bunches using his allowance to buy every Planes-related toy around. (He even refers to them as "Disney's Planes." Mr Bunches is a marketing dream come true.)

    But it's a kid's movie. But "Percy Jackson And The Coattails Of Hogwarts" might swipe some of the slightly-older members of Planes' audience, so:

    1. Elysium: $35 mil.
    2. Planes, $30 mil.
    3. The Wolverine $25 mil.

  4. I plan on signing up sometime this weekend.

    Percy Jackson $40 million
    Elysium $30 million
    Planes $25 million

  5. Well, I'm going to give Elysium a slightly higher bet than I think it will reach 1. because I want it to 2. because everyone else seems settled into the low end potential of the movie. So...
    1. Elysium: $39m
    2. Planes: $32m (and I'm going higher on expectations on this one because it's Pixar)
    3. We're the Millers: $24m

  6. The last thing I want is that Ewe Boll stinker, so here goes.
    1. Elysium - $34 m
    2. Planes - $24 m
    3. Percy Jackson 2 - $18m

  7. Planes @ $37
    Elysium @ $35
    Millers @ $28

    For those talking about Aniston being a stripper...the only nudity in that movie is male sausage, so take that for what it is worth. And @ Andrew Leon - Planes is NOT Pixar...I thought so too, but it was made by the 3rd string at Disney - aka the same group that made the Tinkerbell cartoon movies and other direct to dvd craptaculars. I wondered why Pixar would put out two movies in the same summer and they didn't.

    1. That's what I figured on both of those things. Not that I want to see 45-year-old Jennifer Aniston naked anyway. Like I said it's way too late for that. And yeah I figured it must not be Pixar since they've always been saying "Disney's Planes". They just ripped off Pixar's world and cribbed their story. I guess it's cool since they're all the same company.

    2. Oh... I didn't know that. They've been hyping the Pixar part of it, so I thought that Pixar did it, although I was wondering why Pixar would suddenly do two movies the same summer. That's what I get for not looking.



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