Last month on Hulu I watched another of those straight-to-streaming Nic Cage movies called 211. The movie is about some mercenaries in Afghanistan who rob a bank in Massachusetts after their client tries to screw them by sending their money to a bunch of random banks. Nic Cage is a cop who helps to stop the robbery.
Anyway, I got this idea for a GI Joe reboot movie. I already had an idea a few years ago, but obviously no one is going to do that. (Ironically, I suggested Nic Cage could play Cobra Commander in it.) Nah, let's just half-ass some Snake-Eyes movie and release it during the pandemic so no one watches it. [eye roll]
Anyway (again) I got thinking that these mercs were kind of like GI Joe guys gone bad. That started me down the road with how to do this. Basically the setup is in the war in Afghanistan, Duke and the guy who becomes Cobra Commander were in the same unit. They were probably buddies, though maybe you'd want a scene where the Cobra Commander guy is being a dick to the locals while Duke is more friendly with them. But when their tours are up, the Cobra Commander guy becomes a merc; he offers Duke the chance to go with him, but instead Duke goes home to try to live a normal life.
A little while later, the Cobra Commander guy like in the Nic Cage movie gets betrayed by a client. Let's say it's a US government agency so he has some anti-American motivation. Only in this he gets badly burned and disfigured. So he covers his face with the silver mask thing and decides to take revenge on America.
First he needs money so he and some of his guys knock over a bank. Then he goes to an arms dealer called Destro to get a bunch of guns and stuff so he can really do some damage.
Meanwhile, Scarlett, working for Army Intelligence, tracks Duke down. They have some kind of proof that the Cobra Commander guy is his old buddy. They want Duke's help to track him down. He reluctantly agrees and then meets the rest of their special missions team that has Snake Eyes (of course) and maybe some others like Stalker and Breaker and Roadblock and Beachhead or whoever. I would use some of the more normal ones but whatever.
There are a couple of action set pieces where the good guys get close but can't stop the bad guys. Then there's the big final battle where Cobra Commander and his guys attack something big. I'd say the Capitol but that might be tacky after January 6th last year. Maybe they want to steal a nuclear submarine or raid the Pentagon or something like that.
And then of course Duke has to face off with Cobra Commander, who reveals his gross face. He "dies" and the bad guys are defeated but of course he isn't really gone forever. Meanwhile, Duke, Scarlett, and company are offered the chance to keep their team together to track down more bad guys. Yo Joe!
Maybe not as big as my previous idea, but probably more affordable. I'm just saying. Thanks, Nic Cage!
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