A to Z Challenge Day 2: Beach Head vs Baroness

Ironically, Beach Head has nothing to do with the beach.  He's a Ranger and in the cartoon show was sort of a drill instructor too.  Since green in my favorite color, he always looked kind of cool to me:

He first appeared in the second full season of the cartoon show complaining about the lax discipline of his fellow JOES and Flint reminds him that he's only fourth-in-command after General Hawk, Sgt Duke, and Warrant Officer Flint.  Which makes Beach Head a what?  Their ranking system makes no sense really.  In another episode it's funny because the usual voice actor must have been sick or something so he sounds different because someone else was doing his voice.

He appears in the movie to train the new batch of Joes that includes Jinx, Tunnel Rat, Law & Order, Chuckles (who they were too cheap to give any lines), and someone called Big Lob who didn't have an action figure.  Beach Head is such a hardass that he uses live ammo in the training exercises!  And nearly gets himself blown up when the gray German Shepherd Order keeps fetching a bomb back to him.

His design is kind of a recolored COBRA mercenary Firefly, who'll deal with on F day.

Baroness was the first COBRA female character of which there are only two or maybe three.  She's Eastern European, wears glasses, and it's heavily implied in the cartoon and comics that she's Destro's girlfriend.

Like Snake Eyes (who we'll get to know on S Day) when she first appeared on the cartoon her clothes were bluish for some reason.  Maybe Sunbow thought that would show up better on screen?  As one of the few evil girls she showed up in the cartoon and comics a lot, even though her character wasn't reissued that many times during the 80s and 90s.

In a two-part episode during the first full Sunbow season, a team of Joes is thrown into an evil parallel universe where Baroness is actually a double agent.  She ends up helping the Joes get back to their world.

In the movie she goes undercover to locate the GI JOE energy beaming thing or BET.  That's her big contribution.

Killer Geek Girl!

In the DIC series, Destro dumps the Baroness for the younger Zarana, so she does what anyone would do:  she takes the snakeified Cobra Commander and uses a magic mask to turn him semi-human again to overthrow Serpentor and Destro--until Destro literally dumps Zarana.  After the first miniseries she splits time with Zarana as a master of disguise and Cobra's team vagina, though neither had a figure for sale.

In the 2009 movie, Baroness was played by Sienna Miller and there was this whole lame subplot of how her brother Rex had brainwashed her after Duke "died" and so she dyed her hair from blond to black and started going out with Destro.  But then she stops being evil by the end.  Which was total bullshit; just another reason that movie sucked.