Things have gotten pretty grim and it occurred to me that it really makes sense. The reason the prequels should never really have been attempted is it's really a story all about death:
- Death of the Republic
- Death of the Jedi
- Death of Anakin Skywalker
- Death of Padme
And the birth of evil. It's not really a happy story. Lucas tried to sugarcoat it and that's why it doesn't work. It's a story of evil prevailing, not a cutesy story for kids to cheer. It was better for Lucas just to give a few vague details in the original trilogy and most of us would not really care that much.
But obviously I'm not going to sugarcoat it all that much. Buckle up!
As Vader turns the tide, he feels a disturbance in the Force and goes back to his fighter to zip away, leaving his forces on their own.
Meanwhile, in the Jedi monastery from the previous entry, Padme is giving birth to Luke and Leia. And none of this bullshit about her dying in childbirth for some vague reason. While Obi-Wan is happy for Padme, he too senses a disturbance and knows Vader is going to be on his way to find his children.
(One thing that's bugged me for a while is how Vader and the Emperor could not know about Luke or Leia for almost 20 years. Especially since Luke was living on Tatooine with the Lars family, whom Anakin knew, and using Anakin's surname. Sure it's a backwater planet but it doesn't really make sense. I think it's a plot hole that needs addressed.)
Obi-Wan contacts Yoda, who tells him to take Padme and the kids to an ancient Jedi temple, where some kind of rite can be done to hide them and other Force users from the dark side. The rite needs a lot of Force power, so Yoda and some of the remaining Jedi have to go there as well.
Meanwhile Mace Windu or some other Jedi along with Grievous and the remains of the Separtists plot a scheme to try to tip the balance their way. Using secret hyperspace routes only the Jedi know about, Mace and some others in a shuttle head to Coruscant. Their plan is to capture the new Emperor and force the Empire to surrender.
Obi-Wan arrives at the temple and is shocked to find Maul there! He survived his fight with Vader and hasn't repented, but he wants revenge and at this point the Jedi need all the allies they can get. The ritual begins with the Jedi standing around in a circle and concentrating and/or chanting or some such shit like that. But as they're doing it, there's the roar of a ship overhead. Vader has found them!
The strike team lands on Coruscant to get the Emperor. They make it into his throne room only for him to reveal his Sith lord powers. The strike team is killed, except Windu, who's the last one. He stays alive long enough for the Emperor to reveal his newest weapon: Star Destroyers! A whole fleet of them descending on the Separtist capital world. And then Windu is killed while the Emperor laughs.
Maul faces Vader again to buy the Jedi time they need. As they fight, it's clear Maul will lose, so Obi-Wan goes to help him. They fight together while the others continue the rite.
The battle over the Separtist capital turns into a rout as the powerful new Star Destroyers massacre the older Separatist ships. Grievous orders a retreat, but his ship is disabled and boarded by Stormtroopers. Grievous goes down fighting, but he eventually is killed. And with it the Separtists.
Obi-Wan and Maul are still fighting Vader but Maul is finally killed. Obi-Wan continues alone. Meanwhile the other Jedi complete the ritual so that Luke, Leia, and other Force users will be shielded from the dark side--for a while. Yoda and Padme head for a ship while the others rescue Obi-Wan. The odds are against Vader, but of course that doesn't stop him. (My Vader is like Michael Myers or Jason Voorheis--only he can talk.) The other Jedi are killed and Obi-Wan is the only one left.
Yoda and Padme get the kids on a ship and take off. Vader has the upper hand on Obi-Wan, but seeing the ship taking off, he pushes Obi-Wan away with the Force or whatever so he can get back to his ship. Obi-Wan heads for another ship left there only to find Yoda and the kids already aboard. Padme took the other ship, knowing Vader would go after it.
Above the planet, Vader is bearing down on the ship, trying to disable it so he can board it. Padme sends a message saying he'll never have her or their children. Then she overloads the reactor so it blows up.
Obi-Wan and Yoda have meanwhile left the planet from the other side and enter hyperspace before Vader can see them. They acknowledge Padme's sacrifice and decide to split up the kids to better the chances at least one will survive.
Vader returns to Coruscant, where the Empire is triumphant, though he's far less so. Yoda takes Leia to Bail Organa and Obi-Wan takes Luke to Tatooine. And it can end with that shot that ended the real Episode III.
Yeah, I know it's not a lot of "fun" but again this is a story about death. It's not going to be lots of fun. But there's still some hope at the end. I'm not thrilled about my device to make Luke and Leia "invisible" from the Force or whatever but I couldn't think of a better alternative. I mean there are no amulets or marking or anything like that or magic berries they could eat or some stupid thing like that, right? Though maybe they could have a mark on their bottoms or somewhere we never actually see in the rest of the movies. I'll have to think about it.
Anyway, I checked the boxes I wanted for this:
- Eliminate silliness: Jar-Jar, podracing, Anakin as a kid, Yoda fighting, the "prophecy"
- Eliminate some plot holes: also the "prophecy" and the Emperor/Vader not sensing the Skywalker twins
- Try to make a more even tone
- Give Vader His Balls Back
So there. Next week are three different ideas for Episodes VII-IX. They aren't as in-depth or intense as this was.
1 comment:
I like a lot of this. Vadar getting more action. Padme dying in a way that makes more sense. It also makes her a strong woman, rather than dying of a broken heart or who really knows. It's always a good thing to get rid of Jar-Jar.
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