Thursday, June 28, 2012

Thursday Review: Deep Space Nine

You'll have to forgive me for rambling on about another old show hardly anyone cares about anymore.  I should be talking about "Game of Thrones" or "True Blood" or "Falling Skies" or "Breaking Bad" right Mr. Offutt?  (Well except I don't have HBO so I can't watch the first two.)

Anyway, I always liked DS9.  Part of it might be that it's kind of the neglected middle child of Star Trek series, which being a neglected middle child I can sympathize with.  It did suffer a bit of bad timing in that when it debuted in 1992 Next Gen was still on the air and not long after Next Gen was gone, when DS9 would have been able to go solo, Voyager came along on the ill-fated UPN.  Added to that you had Babylon 5 with a similar premise, which probably stole some of DS9's thunder.  And I'm sure a lot of people would say Babylon 5 is better, though at the time I don't think that aired on a channel my family had or just not at a time where we could watch it so I never saw that until they reran it on TNT years later.

Anyway (again), thanks to Netflix Instant I could rewatch all 7 seasons in about 7 months.  It wouldn't have taken as long if I hadn't spent a month or so rewatching GI JOE from the 80s.  (And yes I'm obsessive in that if I start watching an old series I want to just plow through to the end; I don't mix and match series really.)  I have to say I really did enjoy rewatching the series.  It did make me think (again) that this shouldn't be relegated to a mere footnote in Star Trek history as it was just as good (if not better) than Next Gen and better in my opinion than Voyager or Enterprise--my sisters would disagree with the latter as they have some weird obsession with Enterprise despite the fact they were never really much into Star Trek.

Getting back on track, the basic premise of the show is that for the last fifty years or so the evil Cardassians have been occupying the planet of Bajor.  When the series begins, the Cardassians are finally leaving and Bajor is now free and under the protection of the Federation.  The Federation takes over the old Terok Nor space station, renaming it Deep Space Nine--obviously.

One of the first interesting things is that in this series (at first anyway) the guy in charge was not a captain.  Commander Ben Sisko is sent to this seemingly backwater outpost, which seems likes a dead-end assignment.  Needless to say he's not exactly thrilled at first.  Another interesting thing is that while Kirk and Picard were unattached in terms of family, Sisko has a teenage son Jake and had a wife who was killed during the Borg invasion in Next Gen, which is kind of a sore point when Picard visits him at the station.

But things take a turn when Sisko discovers a "wormhole" near the station that connects the "Alpha Quadrant" to the "Gamma Quadrant" of the Milky Way.  The wormhole is stable because there are aliens living inside of it, who are known to the Bajorans as "the Prophets."  The aliens don't really have a sense of time in the same way as us "corporeal" beings but Sisko is eventually able to explain this to them thanks in part to a baseball analogy--which is really another reason I like this show because I like baseball.

The discovery of the wormhole then overnight transforms DS9 from a remote afterthought to a crucial outpost.  Like St. Louis back in the 19th Century it's kind of the last point of civilization for traders or researchers or colonists going from the Alpha Quadrant to the Gamma Quadrant.  The first two seasons for the most part focus on the cultural clashes and so forth that happen as a result of this.  At the end of the second season "the Dominion" is introduced and parts of the third season then expand on who and what the Dominion is.  It turns out they are pretty much the rulers of the Gamma Quadrant and not so happy about all these ships invading their space.

The fourth season added Worf from Next Gen to the cast as tensions rise between the Federation and its Klingon allies.  By the fifth season there's open war between the two powers, which winds down during that season as the Dominion enters the fray, taking over the station at the end of that season.  The sixth and seventh seasons focus primarily on the war between the Federation and its allies versus the Dominion and its allies (the Cardassians and later the Breen).

Perhaps what I liked most about this show is that since quite a few of the characters were not Starfleet officers they weren't all a bunch of stuffed shirts, which is the way it sometimes seemed on Next Gen and Voyager.  The way they rebooted the Ferengi was especially good, making them pretty much the opposite of Starfleet in their lust for profits.  And in many ways the Ferengi resembled humans of the 20th Century, especially Republican types.  I mean the Ferengi believe in business and profit above everything, believe women should be locked in their homes to serve men (and also that females should not be allowed to wear clothes), and pretty much see everyone else as someone to exploit for personal gain.

Another good idea was transferring Chief O'Brien, a relative minor recurring character on Next Gen, to DS9.  O'Brien was the kind of blue-collar Everyman character the other series lacked.  He was a lot more relatable than most Star Trek characters because he was pretty much just an ordinary guy with a sort of crummy job and a family to support.  To a lesser extent you could say that about Sisko because unlike the other captains he had a family, not only a son but a girlfriend he eventually marries.  That makes him seem not as much of a cold fish as Picard or Janeway or Archer.

Oh yeah and both Dax-es were pretty hot.  I'm just throwing that out there.  Plus the Defiant could have probably kicked the shit out of any of the Enterprises and especially Voyager.

Another thing I liked was the show alternated between doing serious episodes and fun episodes.  Most of the fun episodes involved the Ferengi, like when Quark, his brother, and nephew go back in time to Roswell in 1947.  There were also some fun non-Ferengi ones like when Dr. Bashir is playing a James Bond-type program in the holosuite and then the characters turn into real people from the station and the only way for him to defeat the Dr. Evil-type madman (Sisko) is to let the bad guys win.  Or in another holosuite-related adventure the crew puts together an "Ocean's 11"-style caper to save beloved lounge singer Vic Fontaine.  Maybe it's just my faulty memory, but I don't think they did nearly as much of that in the other series.  Of course some episodes maybe got a little too goofy, like the one where a runabout gets shrunk and has to do a "Fantastic Voyage" type thing in order to save the day.

A lot of the episodes, though written from 92-99, are still relevant today.  All the ones about Quark's mother fighting for female equality among the Ferengi are pretty relevant to the recent War on Women.  Then there's a two-part episode where Sisko, Dax, and Dr. Bashir go back in time to 2024 or so where thanks to a Great Recession all the poor have been rounded up and stuffed into ghettos like Jews in Nazi-occupied territory.  We're only about a Rick Santorum or Donald Trump presidency away from that happening for real.  In another two-parter Sisko goes back to Earth shortly after it's revealed "the Founders" of the Dominion are evil shapeshifters.  There's all sorts of paranoia on Earth about what these evil shapeshifters might be doing and all sorts of intrusive steps taken to find them, to the point where a rogue element of Starfleet establishes martial law.  Those two episodes really smacked of post-9/11 hysteria like the Patriot Act and the need to balance safety with personal liberty.

Since most of my regular visitors are writers, there were a few episodes that were writing-related.  In the second episode of the fourth season "The Visitor" an elderly Jake Sisko has become a reclusive author and is visited by a young woman who loves his work and wants to know why he stopped writing.  He explains then how he stopped writing in order to try and save his father from sort of temporal thing.  I didn't really remember that episode from when it aired in the 90s but watching it now, about 3 years after my father died, I got a little misty-eyed.  In another writing-related episode, a muse stimulates Jake's creativity though nearly kills him.  There's another one where Captian Sisko has a dream where he's a writer for a sci-fi magazine in the 50s and comes up with the whole story for DS9 but it can't get printed because his lead character is black.  (What's interesting about that episode too is you get to see most of the cast without the alien makeup.)

What I really didn't like was first when they added Worf (who was one of my least favorite Next Gen characters after Wesley) and then hooked him up with Dax--the first one.  They already did the "Beauty and the Beast" thing on Next Gen and it was icky then and just as icky on DS9.  So in a way it was a good thing the first Dax left the show because it put an end to that whole plot.  Though it might have been fun to see what kind of baby they could have produced--one with forehead ridges and spots?

Another thing that occurred to me as I rewatched the show is it started to bug me how the first Dax was always going on about her previous host Kurzon--or was it Curzon?  Whatever.  Anyway, it was always Kurzon, Kurzon, Kurzon.  I mean she had 5 other lifetimes before that--and a repressed sixth one that comes up later--so why only keep mentioning the one?  They did a better job with the second Dax of mentioning some of the other ones to balance things out more.

Also, while the first few "mirror universe" episodes--an extension of the original Trek episode where there was an evil parallel universe populated with versions of the characters with goatees--were pretty good, I think the writers went back to that well a little too often.  Pretty much once a year they'd have one of those episodes, though after about the third one it had started to lose its appeal.  Though in the last one you do get a kiss between second Dax and Kira--if that sort of thing appeals to you.  Just throwing it out there.

Certainly one drawback is the effects and such aren't as good as more recent shows.  It's too bad they didn't have better technology and more money back then.  That would have let them render the space battles better and Odo the shapeshifter could have done more shapeshifting.

Finally, like many last episodes, the finale of DS9 was a bit unsatisfying.  The final showdown between Sisko and Dukat seemed really tacked on.  It also didn't make sense in that Dukat and the Kai must have been in the fire caves for about three weeks while everything else was going down.  Eliminating one Ferengi or mirror universe episode might have given them a little more time for the finale instead of compressing it into essentially two episodes.  This was probably one area where Voyager was better, but then it's finale was predestined, sort of like when I watched the finale of "Smallville" where it was predestined to end with Clark becoming Superman; in the same way Voyager was predestined to return to Earth--ooh, spoilers!  There wasn't really any of that for DS9, which probably made it tougher.

But still I enjoyed revisiting this series and if you like Trek you should too.

Tuesday is another Two-Fer.  You know the drill by now...

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Practical Superheroism #2: Form vs. Function

DISCLAIMER:  This column is intended for entertainment purposes.  The advice given here should not ever, under any circumstances, be used in real life.  Not unless you want to get the shit beat out of you and/or killed.  And if you do, there are probably easier ways to go about it.  I'm just saying.

So when we last left our prospective hero, he/she had come up with a really clever and awesome name.  Or probably a not awesome or clever name, but let's assume at least a name.  Now that you've got an identity, you need a costume to go with it.

Yellow spandex kind of stands out...
In the comic books, superheroes have bright, flashy costumes made of stuff like yellow spandex.  More often than not those costumes are toned down a bit in the movies because let's face it, bright yellow spandex is godawful and not very practical.  But if you have regenerative powers and a skeleton of adamantium I suppose it doesn't really matter what you wear.

See how well Batman blends in?
But here in the real world where you don't have regenerative powers or a skeleton made of adamantium, you really need to think safety first.  In particular you need to think of camouflage.  If you think of special ops soldiers like Navy SEALs or Army Green Berets and so forth they don't run around in yellow spandex either.  Because when you're trying to sneak into Osama bin Laden's compound in Pakistan or whatever, you want to be as inconspicuous as possible.  And since you'll probably be doing most of your business at night, you really want to think of muted colors like black, grays, etc., which aren't really colors in a sense.

(At this point if you've chosen a name like The Peacock you might want to reconsider.  Actually you should have reconsidered a long time ago.)

And you might say, "Well you write about a Scarlet Knight who wears a bright yellow cape."  But her armor is magic to protect her from bullets and such, so again it doesn't matter so much if she blends in or not.  She also happens to have the ultimate camouflage in a cape that lets her turn invisible.  You do not have that luxury unless you've happened to find a case of red plate armor created by Merlin the wizard 4,000 years ago.

The second-most important thing besides camouflage is protection.  I'm not talking about condoms, either.  (Though you might want to keep one handy if you run into some damsel in distress--or whatever the male version of that is.)  I'm talking about the type of padding that will minimize the pain and bruises when someone knocks you on your ass, as is inevitable.

At this point you might want to remember that scene in "The Dark Knight" where the imitation Batmen show up to foil a drug deal.  If you notice they're wearing hockey pads and baseball catching gear and such.  This is a good way to get low-cost body protection.  Unless you're a cop or soldier who might have access or a billionaire playboy with a multinational corporation you probably can't get bulletproof vests or sweet Kevlar-mesh armor.  If you can't afford a trip to Dick's or another sporting goods store, then as a last resort you could always strap some cookie sheets or similar metal objects to your body.  It probably won't be that much help, but it's better than nothing.

Though when you're looking for protection, make sure you get something lightweight and flexible, especially if you're going to be doing any martial arts stuff.  You don't want to go shambling around like the Frankenstein monster--unless that's your schtick.  I would also say an anti-concussion helmet and for guys a cup is a good way to go.

Whatever you do, make sure you cover your face as much as possible.  Maybe in comic books they can't figure out that Clark Kent is Superman and Diana Prince is Wonder Woman because the secret identity wears glasses, but chances are in the real world someone will be able to figure that out.  And just wearing one of those little domino masks isn't a good idea either.  If you don't have a full helmet then put on a ski mask or something similar to that so most of your face is covered.  That way when the wanted posters come out someone won't be able to finger you so easily.

Finally, I get annoyed when people quote that "No capes" line from The Incredibles when I talk about my hero because her cape actually has a couple of useful purposes.  Since it's magic, it lets her turn invisible and makes for a parachute.  But again you don't have access to magic--so no capes.

Now presumably you have some kind of costume.  Next month we'll start in on your fighting style.  (Mine is possum style, as in go down and pretend to be dead.)

Tomorrow is my long, rambling commentary on watching all seven seasons of "Star Trek:  Deep Space Nine."  I'm sure you're thrilled.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Two-Fer Tuesday #9

It's Tuesday, which means another Two Fer Tuesday.  If you're not acquainted with the rules, I use a random number generator to pick a page and paragraph to pluck two sentences from.  Let's see what we get this week.

Page Number:  215
Paragraph Number: 1 

Well we had a good run, but this one might be a bit disappointing.

  
“Two weeks.  She said we can’t play together during that time.”

I'll give you a hint who's talking.  It's one of the Emma's in the animated GIF.  You're welcome.  Of course Offutt already knows what this refers to so he'll probably post some spoilers.

GOOD NEWS:  I sent the last revisions back to my "editor" last night and she's going to forward the story to the head editor now.  Which should mean now I just have to wait for them to format the thing.  Still, it's closer than ever to being released!

Tomorrow is the second edition of Practical Superheroism...don't try this at home!!!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Thursday Review: The Handmaid's Tale

Today's post is going to get a little bit grumpy.  This is the review of The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood I wrote on Amazon and my Grumpy Bulldog Book Reviews site.  This is an older book but it's one of those that when I read it I realized it has some relevance for 2012.

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It's just as well I didn't read this book when I bought it in December 2011 on sale.  I probably would have scoffed at the idea that a hard-line fascist patriarchy could take over what was once America.  Reading it in May 2012 now I'm not nearly as skeptical.  Hearing the hard-line stances of those like Rick Santorum and Rush Limbaugh infamously calling a woman a "slut" for wanting birth control makes me think there is a portion of this country that would enact something just like Atwood describes.

What she describes in "The Handmaid's Tale" is a patriarchal society where most women are stripped of all rights.  There's a caste system of sorts enacted.  At the top are the "Wives" who are (obviously) the wives of high-ranking officials in the new regime.  There are also "Econowives" who are the wives of lesser officials.  The Wives have servants called "Marthas" who toil away in the kitchens and so forth.  And then since most Wives are older and infertile, there are the Handmaids.  The Handmaids are tasked with giving birth to a baby, which is then turned over to the Wife to raise.

Now since this is a hard-line religious establishment where doctors and scientists are killed or locked up, they can't use scientific means like artificial insemination.  Instead there's a whole bizarre ritual that takes place every few nights that involves the Commander (the male head of the household) getting it on with the Handmaid while the wife is present.  There's nothing seductive or kinky about all of it; it's all pretty sterile, which might be why it's ineffective.

The person telling the tale is a Handmaid known as Offred (as in she's Fred's property).  She describes life in her household and at other intervals talks about life before the new order took over.  In that life, Offred had a real name and a husband named Luke and also a daughter.  She had a feminist mother and a lesbian friend named Moira.

I think if you want to complain about anything it's that not a lot really HAPPENS in terms of plot.  So if you were looking for a taut thriller or anything like that, then you wouldn't enjoy this.  The obvious point of comparison would be "1984".  I would also say that was a better book in that Orwell has more of a story arc concerning Winston being seduced by the "rebellion" and then betraying the one he loves in order to save his own skin, thereby crushing his spirit.  (Oh, whoops, sorry for the spoilers.)  While Atwood's book is riveting, the world she builds doesn't really go anywhere.  Offred isn't forced to make the same choices as Winston.  And I have to say I found the last 6% or so, the epilogue, to be a little corny.

Still, with the recent events I already mentioned, the hard-line anti-abortion laws being enacted in "red states" and so forth, I think this is an important book to read (or reread) at this point in history.  Especially if you're female you should read this to see the worst that can happen.

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So there you go.  About the only thing that does give me hope is that as the years go by here we'll see the old establishment of people who grew up in the 30s-50s giving way to younger people who grew up in the 70s-80s, post-Roe v Wade, post-sexual revolution, etc.  By that I mean people like me who were born in the 70s and grew up in the 80s we didn't live with all that stereotypical "Leave It to Beaver" bullshit where mom was supposed to be home every day cooking and cleaning and whatnot.  A lot of our moms had jobs, though not mine.  But I've had female bosses and co-workers everywhere I've worked, so it doesn't really threaten me that women have rights the way it does Rush Limbaugh and other old white guys.  So maybe people from my generation won't feel the need to try and oppress everyone who is different from them.  Or we'll find someone else to oppress.

Tuesday is another scintillating Two-Fer!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Everyday Heroes #2

I'll admit I was kind of lazy about this.  Usually I write my articles in advance, but this one has kind of been sitting on the back burner for a while.  I kept hoping something would jump out at me on the websites I frequent, but as the deadline approached I figured I should finally get more proactive about finding an article about someone who's done good in their community.  That's actually a lot harder than you might think since most of the top stories in newspapers and such are about murders and robberies and so forth.

Anyway, after a little digging I came up with this article from the Huron Daily Tribune in Michigan's "Thumb" area.  It's about Detective Richard Koehler, who after almost 30 years is retiring from law enforcement.  In that time he's worked in a variety of roles from road patrol to undercover narcotics to the dive team to detective.  He's really been a jack of all trades for that area, which had to require a lot of talent and dedication.

So here's saluting another everyday hero!

Detective uncovers new career path

By STACY LANGLEY
Tribune Staff Writer


HURON COUNTY — He’s been solving crime for years as a detective for the Huron County Sheriff’s Office.

Now Detective Richard Koehler will investigate retirement.

Friday afternoon, Koehler said good-bye to those he’s worked with throughout his law enforcement career which has spanned just more than 30 years at the sheriff’s office.


“I’ve worked for four different sheriff’s,” said Koehler who was hired May 1, 1982, to work full-time in the corrections department by then Sheriff Richard V. Stokan.

Koehler, a Pigeon-native, worked construction in southeast Michigan before returning to the Thumb-area where he began a career he’s been passionate about ever since.

“I worked in new home construction, and excavating. I got a builder’s license on the eve of the housing collapse of 1980. So things didn’t go so great for me then,” he said. “At that time, I wanted to get back living around here. I came back (to Huron County) and got a job in corrections working at the sheriff’s office. I’ve been here ever since.”

Working as a corrections officer was a stepping stone for Koehler, who chose to become a certified police officer, attending the police academy in 1985.

“I’ve known and worked with Richard Koehler ever since I started at the sheriff’s office in the early 80s,” said Huron County Sheriff Kelly J. Hanson, who attended the police academy with Koehler. “Richard loves being a part of things and wanting to be more involved back when he was a corrections officer. He was as full of energy then, as he is now.”

While still in corrections, Koehler offered up his brand new S-10 Blazer to be used for surveillance in a murder investigation, Hanson recalled about an incident in the 1980s.

“I used his vehicle, and the investigation took us into the Bay City-area. So I think he was pretty happy when I brought it back,” Hanson said. “He’s always been dedicated to the operation of the sheriff’s office.”

From 1986 until 1992, Koehler worked road patrol for the sheriff’s department.

“It was just a natural progression. At that time, road patrol candidates were picked from the corrections department and then you were sponsored by the department to go to the (police) academy,” he said. “I hated midnights. Back then (as a corrections officer) we worked a swing shift, on days, midnight’s and afternoons. It was an emotional, sleep deprived ordeal. On the afternoon shift, you never had a chance to see your family. But as time went on, things changed and we went to regular shifts.”

By the fall of 1995, the clean-cut road patrol deputy, began undercover work with Thumb Narcotics Unit (TNU), and he looked every bit the part— even growing his hair long.

“I worked undercover for two and a half years with TNU. I learned a lot there. I also worked on the citizens grand jury for a year and a half. I’ve done a lot different things in this job. And I can honestly say, that from the day I walked in the door here (at the sheriff’s department), until the day I leave — I have loved every bit of it,” he said. “I strive to do more because I love what I do.”

And doing more has included adding to his skill-set, getting his EMT license, becoming a member of the dive team and undergoing the training to become an accident reconstructionist.

“I still have my EMT license and maintain that, and I still ice dive. I have the best job in the world. I’m going to miss it dearly, but I’ll get over it,” he laughed. “I want to thank all the past and present county employees, law enforcement and elected officials I have worked with over the past 30 years. It has been a pleasure to work with true professionals and public servants both in Huron County, adjoining counties and across the state. Public service has been a passion of mine and Peggy’s (Koehler’s wife) over the years. We owe a lot to the people that we served. At times, I may not have been able to completely satisfy every victim in every case, but I tried my best.”

Koehler said he has plans to enjoy his retirement, travel and even work a bit.

“What I like about what I will be doing is that it’s 180 degrees away from what I’m doing now,” he said.

That work is in the form of an online marketing business called Market America, a business Koehler has only been able to dabble in for the past few years due to his work load as a detective.

“I can be in my office doing a (police) report thinking to myself in 30 minutes I will be going home for the day. Then 29 minutes later, something happens and I won’t see home for the next day. That is the way this job (as a detective) goes,” he said. “In a small department like this, you wear a lot of different hats. I’ve done diving, search and rescue, the airboat, accident reconstruction, and Mission Investigation with the Michigan Sheriff’s Association.”

When Koehler was finished undercover work with TNU, he was back on the road as a patrol deputy splitting his duties doing both road patrol and working in the detectives bureau.

“When they needed me on the road I went on the road, but the detectives bureau is where I wanted to be,” said Koehler, who was promoted to a full-time detective in 2001.

His hard work and dedication during his career and his role in raising the funds to allow the department to purchase an airboat were a few of the reasons he was named Officer of the Year for 2004.

“He’s always treated people in a very professional and decent manor,” said Undersheriff Ron Roberts who has worked as Koehler’s partner for most of his career. “He’s a pleasure to work with. He works very hard at what he does and he cares about the job he does.”

Koehler said he’s going to miss seeing the people he’s worked with every work day, but he said he’s ready to experience what life is like outside law enforcement.

“There are so many capable people that work for this department. It has been good to see how they have developed in their careers over the years. And I will enjoy watching how they continue to grow into what they do,” he said. “With the recent wave of retirees leaving here, I counted one time, there’s 260 years of service leaving this department. But the people who are staying have a lot of years of experience too. There’s a lot of brain power here. I’m going to miss all the guys here that I basically grew up with. I think that if I were the first one retiring it would be tougher. The other guys who have left before me survived — I will too.”

Koehler said he will also miss the day to day interaction with the courts, prosecutor’s office, other police agencies, the Department of Human Services, Huron Behavioral Health, hospitals, ambulance crews and fire departments.

“I’ve had the pleasure to speak to a lot of civic groups, work at fundraisers and volunteer with organizations in the community,” he said. “The friendships that I have established over the years have been priceless. If I have any regrets it is for not being able to help a victim of crime because of not having enough evidence, especially those victims that sometimes can’t speak for themselves, such as children.”

Bad Axe Police Chief David Rothe, said he’s worked with Koehler for about 11 years now and he’s going to be missed.

“Through his character he has developed a lot of friends, who often help out law enforcement,” Rothe said. “He’s a hell of an investigator and a big asset to this county.”

Some of the cases Rothe and Koehler have investigated together have been drug cases something Koehler said he’s going to miss doing.

“Drug cases are personal for me. That stuff destroys so many lives,” Koehler said. “When you think back on all the cases you’ve handled, you often think of the most recent or the high profile cases. But the saddest thing I’ve experienced in my career here was the death of Deputy Kelly Vermeersch, I was there at the crash scene. It still brings tears to my eyes.”

Koehler said when he looks back at his career he’s leaving the department the way he hoped he would.

“I set goals for myself. I wanted to have 30 years in and retire from law enforcement when I was 60. Even though I enjoy it, I want to see these other young guys have a chance at it. I’m not that selfish to think that I’m the only one that can do this job. I don’t think the place is going to crumble when I walk out the door. Everyone has their own way of doing things. I’m taking my cue from some of the guys who have retired. Ron Roberts and I have always been a team in how we handle things. We know it’s not one individual but a team effort.”

As for Roberts, he said he’s sad to see Koehler go.

“We’ve been together for most of our careers,” Roberts said. “I’m sorry he’s leaving but happy for his family that he’s leaving healthy and able to enjoy the next part of his life.”

Hanson said that Koehler, who is as well thought of and well-liked person in the department, will be missed.

“I’ve told him whether retired or not — he’s still a part of this organization for life,” Hanson said.

Koehler’s position as detective for the sheriff’s office will be filled by Deputy Daryl Ford.

“Daryl and I have been working together for some time. He’ll do a good job,” Koehler said. “We all have our own way of doing this job and now it’s his turn.”

Koehler said he’s seriously excited about retirement.

“I have a lot of things to do and they’re all good things,” he said. “This might be the end of this career, but just the start of another.”
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If you want to nominate someone to be an Everyday Hero or you just spot an article that would fit, just go to the Contact Me page and pass along a link.  I know that smacks of effort, but come on, it's not that hard.  I did find out the Huffington Post does a feature kind of like this, so maybe I'll just steal stuff from them.


Tomorrow's review shows why The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood is so relevant in 2012...

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Two-Fer Tuesday #8

It's Tuesday, which means another Two Fer Tuesday.  If you're not acquainted with the rules, I use a random number generator to pick a page and paragraph to pluck two sentences from.  Let's see what we get this week.

Page Number:  51
Paragraph Number: 6

Hmmm, you could say this week's Two-Fer is murder...



Donovan tried not to disturb the scene until the forensics people got here.  She doubted they would find anything, unless the killer was stupid enough not to wear gloves.  

Who's dead?  And whodunit?  What a tease...

Tomorrow we celebrate another Everyday Hero...  

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Thursday Review: Batman: The Court of Owls

Old business:  Craig Edwards was the first to answer yesterday's trivia question.  It was Hawkman and Hawkwoman (I also would have accepted the less-PC "Hawkgirl") who fought Byth so he got the $5.  In the random drawing the number generator selected Dr. Laura Diamond for the $1 participation prize.  You can read her excellent story in the Day of Demons anthology here.

Now on to new business:
In the past couple of years I've read a few Batman comics, though all older ones:  the first anthology of 1939-1940 comics, The Killing Joke, The Dark Knight Returns, the Knightfall/Knightsend saga that is in part inspiration for the latest movie, and Batman: Vampire (all three graphic novels in that series were written 5-10 years before Twilight).  I also at one point read the novelization of the "No Man's Land" series.  So between all that and that I love the recent Batman movies, it made sense if I were going to dip my toe into more recent comic book waters to start with the Caped Crusader.


Batman:  The Court of Owls is a compilation of the first seven issues of the "New 52" relaunch where DC Comics basically started each of their 52 books over again at issue #1.  Though it's not really a "reboot" in the sense we aren't starting over with Batman's origin and whatnot.  It's a good thing I had browsed other recent Batman titles on Amazon and read a couple things on Wikipedia and Tony Laplume's Comics Reader blog that helped get me somewhat up to speed on stuff that's happened before this so I knew how many former Robins were still hanging around (3) and who the current one was (Damian Wayne, Batman's son) and that after Bruce Wayne's "death" back around 2008-2009 the first Robin (aka Dick Grayson, aka Nightwing) had been filling in until Bruce's inevitable return.

Anyway, when this begins, Bruce Wayne has decided to revitalize Gotham by building some new skyscrapers and renovating the public transit system and so forth.  The Court of Owls takes exception to this, which they express at the scene of a murder.  The murder victim has a bunch of throwing knives marked with owl symbols stuck in him and in gasoline on the wall is written, "Bruce Wayne Will Die Tomorrow."  So in the second issue, an assassin tries to kill Bruce, but of course he doesn't die because we can't "kill" Bruce Wayne again so quickly, right?  I mean pulling that same stunt twice in less than 5 years would be extremely lame.

From there Bruce begins investigating the Court of Owls, who were a seemingly fictitious group dating from the 1880s or perhaps earlier.  It's said the Court of Owls watches everything in Gotham and if they don't like you, they'll send their "Talon" to kill you.  As you'd suspect, the court is very real and now making its presence felt.

One thing I was skeptical about was that owls don't seem that badass to me.  I mean I knew they ate mice (and apparently bats) but I never really thought of them as overly vicious.  Mostly when I think of owls I think of Owl from "Winnie the Pooh" cartoons.  Eagles or Falcons or Hawks would seem a lot cooler or just a generic Raptors.  But I digress...

Eventually Batman ends up in the Court's "Labyrinth," where the book takes some weird psychedelic turns, mostly because the only water in the Labyrinth is drugged, probably with some LSD-like hallucinogen.  In some cases the book takes literal turns as you have to turn the book sideways to read the page and then later upside-down to read it from right-to-left.  I found that more irritating than clever.

Despite that, this book did hook me.  I definitely want to read a few more issues and to learn more about the Court of Owls.  I'm curious if it turns out this rich mayoral candidate is in cahoots with them.  If so I'll get a little grumpy because my novel deals with a similar subject though really that was also part of "Batman Returns" which was itself taken from an episode of the '60s series which was probably cribbed from a comic book which was cribbed from somewhere else.  So it goes.

Mr. Laplume says the art looks similar to "The Dark Knight Returns" and I tend to agree, though I think the art in this is a little better.  Not that I'm an expert.  Half the time I have to force myself to really pay attention to it because I'm so busy reading the words, which is a bad habit from 20-some years of reading books without pictures.  I will say the parts in the Labyrinth freaked me right the hell out about as much as the last part of the Batman Vampire one where he's a dessicated corpse going around slaughtering villains.  I'm kind of a wuss about that stuff.  It is a good reminder that most comics are not for little kids anymore unless you want to give them nightmares.  Maybe you're a jerk that way.

So there you go, my first comic book review.  I hope I didn't give too many "spoilers".

Tuesday is another Two-Fer that probably will not give your kids nightmares.  I make no guarantees.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Superhero Trivia Question #2

1,001 Comic Book Trivia Questions (Revised Edition) 
It's the second Wednesday of the month and so today is the superhero trivia question.  I'm taking these from 1001 Comic Book Trivia Questions by Rich Meyer.  I'm not sure how great it is, but it was cheap and available for my Kindle.  Anyway, if you have a problem with the question or answer, it's his fault.


Without further adieu, here's the question:

"The shape-changing alien Byth was the first menace from which a pair of alien police officers defended the Earth.  What were their names?"

Answer in the comments.  First one to get it right gets a $5 gift card to Amazon in their email or Facebook.  (Again, I'm not mailing a $5 gift card.  I'm not sure Amazon would even let you do that.)

If you aren't first, never fear!  One respondent will be selected by random number generator to receive a $1 gift card.  Yes, you can give $1 gift cards.  Buy yourself a cheap eBook or MP3 or use it to get a dollar off something else.  The winner for this will be announced tomorrow.  The same person cannot win both gift cards because while that would be more convenient for me it wouldn't really be fair for everyone else.

Also I've decided on what I call the "Andrew Leon Rule" where the same person cannot win the trivia question each month.  So if you win this month you won't be eligible to win the $5 for another 3 months (until September).  But you can still win the $1 participation prize.  Andrew Leon is already disqualified this month for winning May's question.

Good luck!!!

Tomorrow the winners will be announced and I will be dipping my big toe into recent comic book waters with Batman:  The Court of Owls.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Two-Fer Tuesday #7



It's Tuesday, which means another Two Fer Tuesday.  If you're not acquainted with the rules, I use a random number generator to pick a page and paragraph to pluck two sentences from.  Last week was a pretty good one-so let's see what we get this week.

Page Number:  93
Paragraph Number: 1

This is an interesting one:



A hand caressed her cheek; it certainly felt like her mother’s hand.  She opened her eyes, seeing her mother in the flesh, just the way she remembered.   

Is her mother really there?  Has she risen from the grave?  Is it her evil twin?  Hurm...

Get ready tomorrow for the next edition of the Superhero Trivia Quiz.  Odds are better you'll win since the Andrew Leon Rule is in full effect--unless you're Andrew Leon of course.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Who Wants to Be a Five Dollaraire?

If you want to make a cool $5 or $1 for doing relatively little, Wednesday is once again your chance with Superhero Trivia #2.  Wednesday morning at noon EST I'll post a trivia question that somehow relates to superhero lore because that's what my book deals with in case you haven't realized by now. 

  • The first person to answer correctly wins a $5 gift card from Amazon.*
  • For everyone else, I will select one person using a random number generator to win a $1 gift card from Amazon.*

Cutoff for entering is 11:59pm EST on Wednesday.  Results will be announced Thursday.

*In order to receive the gift card you must have a valid Email or Facebook account to send it to.  I'm not mailing you a card for $5 or $1, OK? 

Also, the Andrew Leon Rule is in effect, which means the winner last month is not eligible to win the $5 this month.  (That would be the aforementioned Andrew Leon.)  So your odds are perhaps even better to win the $5 this month!

So clear your schedule on Wednesday at noon EST to win!

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Thursday Review #6: Bottom 10 Superhero Movies

Last week I gave you my Top 10 Superhero Movies, so it's only natural that we get into the Bottom 10 after that.  I think you can pretty well guess what the first couple would be.  Or not.  These are just my humble opinion, so maybe you even like some of these movies.  In which case I will just shake my head sadly.


  1. Batman & Robin:  an astounding fact is this movie didn't kill George Clooney's movie career before it had hardly begun.  Otherwise this makes the 1960s "Batman" seem subtle by comparison.
  2. The Spirit:  This movie never seemed to decide if we should be taking it seriously or laughing at it.  I did more of the latter.  And just like the first "Pirates of the Caribbean" there's no point in having two immortal characters fighting because obviously neither can die, so why bother?  At least in "Highlander" they could kill each other by chopping off the other guy's head.
  3. Jonah Hex:  When a non-kids movie comes in at just about 70 minutes, you know there were some problems.  A lot of problems.  The biggest problem:  Megan Fox continuing to tease us all by not getting naked. 
  4. Ghost Rider:  another astounding fact is that someone actually greenlit a sequel to this.  Could it be any dumber than the original?  Probably.
  5. Captain America (1990):  The bar was set pretty low for the 2011 movie to top this. What it really demonstrated was the 2011 version was right to focus more on the WWII part because in the 1990 version he goes on essentially one mission and gets frozen for 50 years.  Not much of a superhero there.
  6. Spawn:  to borrow from Homer Simpson, "That's brilliant!  No, wait it's needlessly complicated."  That pretty much sums up the plot.
  7. Superman III:  I can just imagine some film executive saying, "Hey, you know what would be great?  Let's cast Richard Pryor as a computer hacker who helps Superman save the world from Robert Vaughn."  Yeah, that worked out real well.  Another astounding fact is that there was a "Superman IV."
  8. Catwoman:  I think the biggest problem was they never figured out if Catwoman was supposed to be a superhero or supervillain or what.  Plus all the gratuitous butt shots when she plays basketball against Benjamin Bratt.  Also, casting Benjamin Bratt.
  9. Supergirl:  Actually the whole concept of Supergirl is kind of lame--she's just like Superman except a girl!  This movie certainly didn't change my opinion of that.
  10. HancockI saw this in the cheap theater.  I suppose it was worth my $2 for the first half-hour where he's all pissed-off and drunk and breaking shit and shoving a guy's head up someone else's ass.  The rest of the movie got increasingly idiotic.  I suppose at some point there will be an even more terrible sequel which could easily be added to this list.
Dishonorable Mentions:

Here are some I'm pretty sure are terrible but I didn't really watch them:
  • Punisher: War Zone
  • Elektra
  • Ghost Rider 2
  • The Phantom
  • The Shadow

There are probably some more I'm forgetting about.  I'm not sure you can argue that any of the ones I picked shouldn't be on this list.  Really I think before 2000 the only decent superhero movie was Tim Burton's "Batman" from 1989.  Otherwise they all ranged from meh to godawful.  I don't know if it's because effects got better or filmmakers started to take the genre more seriously.  That's something for film critics to ponder I suppose, though most of them liked "Superman" and "Superman II" so they would not agree with my assessment.


Tuesday is another Two-Fer...

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Two-Fer Tuesday #6

It's Tuesday, which means another Two Fer Tuesday.  If you're not acquainted with the rules, I use a random number generator to pick a page and paragraph to pluck two sentences from my novel A Hero's Journey.  Let's see what we get this week.

Page Number:  186
Paragraph Number: 5

This one is a little better than last week.  A little more action-packed at any rate.



She didn’t actually call for an ambulance, not having the time.  She did the next best thing by grabbing an usher by the front of his shirt.  

Who and why?  You'll just have to use your imagination.

Tomorrow is another Insecure Writer's Group post...

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