8 Already Bad Movies Ruined By Bad Twist Endings

Another little fake clickbait article based on bad Rifftrax movies.  All of these movies are already pretty lame, but then they go and have stupid twist endings that put M Night Shymalan to shame and make an already bad movie badder.

ROTOR

This movie is a riff (pun intended) on Terminator where a police robotics scientist who lives on a ranch (because that's a real thing) creates a cyborg cop that goes nuts and starts stalking a woman who committed the deadly crime of being the passenger in a car that was speeding.  With the help of a skunk-haired lesbian mathematician (also a real thing!), the scientist kills his creation.  Hooray!  But then as he's leaving a police station his former boss shoots him in the back.  Just totally random.  So our hero survives the whole movie and gets shot by some guy who was barely in the movie for like no reason?  Um...yeah.  And then the scientist's notes go to a nephew who to that point was never mentioned.  Makes perfect sense!

Ghosthouse

A ham radio DJ (because that was a thing in the 80s) and his vaguely European girlfriend go to an abandoned house that's haunted by a creepy little girl and her clown doll.  While several people die in bizarre ways, the ham radio guy and his girlfriend survive...until they go home and one day he's crossing the street and gets hit by a truck.  The implication is that the creepy clown doll is still alive and had him murdered.  So again the hero survives the whole movie and then just gets killed almost at random.  Hooray?

Fever Lake

In the 90s 6 college students including Mario Lopez and Corey Haim(?) go to the eponymous lake to a house.  After a lot of boredom that's supposed to be spooky, a lot of weird shit happens.  Corey Haim(?) is maybe making it happen or something because when he was a kid his father murdered his mother and then "turned the axe on himself," which is apparently a thing.  He confronts one of the girls who now is channeling the spirit of his mother.  Then she starts melting for...reasons.  Later a deputy and waitress are talking at the diner and he mentions they found 2 girls but she knows there were 3 who came into the diner.  So, um, what happened to the third one?  Was she always a ghost?  Did a ghost replace her at some point?  In which case, is the real girl still alive?  Is the ghost really dead or will she reappear?  And was Corey Haim(?) making stuff happen or was it the Native American guy or the ghost maybe mom?  What does any of it mean?!  (The answer is:  who cares?)

Frankenstein Island

In this "film," 4 guys in hot air balloons crash on an island populated by scantily-clad women, sailors, and Sheila, the wife of Dr. Frankenstein who is in contact with his ghost.  The four guys eventually unleash the Frankenstein monster chained underwater to wreck the place and escape.  They bring the Army back later and everything is gone!  There's no sign that anything happened...except their dog shows up.  So did it really happen?  Did they imagine it?  Does anyone really give a crap?

Bermuda Triangle

This movie is about a yacht that goes into the Bermuda Triangle for whatever reason.  A little girl on board finds a creepy old doll that somehow causes weird things to happen.  A lot of the "plot" involves boring swimming expeditions in the community swimming pool Atlantic Ocean and shooting sharks that weren't even bothering them.  Then people start dying for various reasons.  At the end the captain radios for help and a guy in the navy or coast guard or whatever says, "Hey, that ship sank 12 years ago!"  And then the boat disappears except for the creepy doll.  So, um, the whole thing was a dream?  It's like if everyone in The Sixth Sense were Bruce Willis.  I see dead people!

The Last Slumber Party

A lame slumber party is invaded by an even lamer killer.  Three of the worst, bitchiest teenage girls are killed very slowly by an escaped mental patient with a scalpel.  And then one girl wakes up and realizes it was all a dream!  Then she goes over to the house and the killer shows up to start killing them...again.  Ironically the same girl earlier dreamed it was the morning after and was then attacked by the killer.  So it was kind of a dream-within-a-dream.  Take that Inception!  Now if only my watching it were all a dream.

Rock n Roll Nightmare

A crappy hair band goes to a farmhouse to record an album.  Then they're beset by puppets demons.  Everyone is killed in weird ways except for the lead singer.  He faces off with the head demon and suddenly declares that he's an angel and all the people in the band were just imaginary.  For some reason then his clothes all disappear except for spiky metal underwear.  And after he wrestles a couple of Gumby dolls he has a tickle fight with the head demon.  But really, so all those people who died and I didn't care about were fake?  What a screw you to the audience!  Or it would be if I gave a shit.  The weirdest part of it is the "angel" has sex with one of the female bandmates in the shower.  So was that a demon or one of his imaginary people?  If it's the latter does that count as masturbation?

Tourist Trap

It's the usual scenario where a bunch of dumb college kids are out for spring break or whatever and then their car breaks down and they end up walking to an old tourist trap run by Chuck Connors.  (How many times has that happened to you?)  Except Chuck Connors supposedly has a "brother" who's kind of a homeless man's Leatherface who kills people and turns them into mannequins.  Well except then we find out the "brother" is really Chuck Connors.  And he has telekinesis!  And somehow has the power to turn supposedly live people into mannequins.  At the end the one good girl kills him and leaves the house.  We end with her driving a car with three mannequins that look like her friends.  So, um, were they mannequins all along?  Was she crazy this whole time?  Did any of it happen?  What the hell, movie?!  This makes no sense!  Life is meaningless!!!!  GAAAAAAAH!!!!

So this is how you take something bad and make it even worse.  Sometimes these twists can work.  The "killing the main character at the end almost randomly" was used in Night of the Living Dead, Layer Cake, and The Ghostwriter for example. Those also had a good rest of the movie to go with them, which makes a difference.  It helps if the movie can establish a good relationship with the viewer to gain his/her confidence so he/she will suspend disbelief a little easier.  Too often, though, I think movies try for plot twists just for the sake of having a twist and it doesn't really work.